August, after waking up from a 20-hour nap:

"I had this dream where you, me, Dan Greene, Jack Hittenger, a terrier and Tom Waits were trashing Saga. Jack was apparently feeling vindictive and kept shouting that we were doing "random acts of terrierism" and then Dan Greene hit him. Tom Waits kept talking in his weird-ass voice about how he had done this stuff for 20 years."

Indeed, what is dada?

Schnaugs

The thing about living with just August - with the rest of you off Happy Holidaying - is that one day he'll appear and be saying "what's for dinner" and give you a 20 minute discussion of Weber on Melville and then you won't see him again for days. It's weird, the sporaticness. And also his mom kinda freaked me out.


Is there any consensus on the prefered late-December holiday(s) well-wishing from the Beat? Merry X-kwananukkamas?

So not true

"Undergrad presentations are no place for experimentations in slant rhyme."
        - Dan Greene

Microsoft Office has given me an early dose of home.

Spellcheck is apparently set on appalachian mode--below is the sentence it suggested:

"With them fingers close my eyes."

Ryan, I order you to write a song.

P.S. I just spellchecked this message; spellcheck doesn't recognise itself.

Oh the void.

I had a dream...

that we started this club were we sat around and watched videos of suicide bombers all day and Dave kept saying, "well, at least we're not those guys!"

Not only is the Void staring back...it is also making funny faces.

Courtesy of Farnham: a slogan off.

Current idea at the Beat: write ourselves and/or the Beat into Wikipedia.

Gibs, after some sort of revelatory experience involving a buggy and train, is starting a counter movement. The Beat will soon be devided into two factions - The Voids and The Absurds.

The void

"Picture a number of men in chains, and all condemned to death; each day some are strangled in the sight of the rest; those who remain see their own condition in that of their fellows, looking at one another with sorrow and without hope, each awaiting his turn. This is the picture of the condition of man."
        - Pascal

Evan's Fingers Be Lightning, John's Drums Be a Cannon, and Kyle's Bass Blows Our Collective Asses Out

An acrid pall is hanging over our basement, thick with a loathesome doom. It smells of beer, melted tubes and fire. Like a war. Like a firefight. The whole house is hemorrhaging sound as Midnight Special rocks the revolution.

Two double-deuces of Steel Reserve is cheaper than a forty, FYI.

The summit of void is insurmountable.

Since posting Toothpaste for Dinner comics seems to be the flavor of the week, here's one for the beat.

Blackout '05
Beatniks in the dark.

Everyone at The Beat is losing their respective minds. Man to watch for the upcoming week: Jon.

House Neurosis Poll:
1.Jon
2.Me
3.Lee
4.August
5.Dan
6.HoneyBear
7.Harvey

Somewhere in Japan....

Testing testing...

Can you smoke caffine? Apparently, no one's tried and we don't know.

Why are cell phones great? So your roommate can call you from the bathroom and ask you to bring him TP.

Nominations on best costume of the night?

You should read John McNamara's blog.

Crunk Fix
I've been layin' down some tracks with a buddy.
AETz: The heaviest bombs in Japan since Nagasaki.

SATURDAY NIGHT

THE BEAT

COMMUNIST PARTY

spread the revolution, comrad!

Just to clear things up, the beatnick found passed out in random house, was found passed out in random frat house. On the pot (not the rag). And he also blew chunks. He blew chunks at the presidents house. On the presidents lawn.

So, August made a zing tonight. Not a burn, not a burn pshhhh, and certainly not a burn third degree pshhhh. We talked about it, and his comment "they are descent" in response to my comment that people have sex with the dead all the time.

Can we invite this guy to one of our parties?

"Ohhhhh, uterian Cock Block. 'The fruit of my loins shall not be corrupted by your seed, be gone!'" Lee's description of my date last saturday.

August: Are you hung over?
Lee: No.
August: Well you're drinking water...

Lee and Jon, in a contest to describe the Beat

sketch
sketchy
the sketch
el sketcherino
sketchalicious
sketched up
sketchtastic 7000
sketchilliac
sketcherific
sketchzilla
sketchville
sketchburg
sketchopolis
sketchogo
sketchvestites
sketchfuzz

Lee: We also make up funny words.

Friday night review:

One beatnik AWOL, found next morning passed out in random house.

Five people passed out in the living room.

At least two beatniks barfing their guts up.

One beatnik maced in the face for touching member of the same sex in their "bathing suit area."

PS. one Beat Pledge barfing the next morning...light weight.

I thought I'd pass this on

If anyone is interested besides me...

My Morning Jacket and Kathleen Edwards in concert at St. Andrews next Tuesday (25th). Kathleen is like a Canadian Lucinda Williams. She's very good - I'd say she's nearly as good as Lucinda, which is saying something. MMJ is Neil Young playing Radiohead awash in reverb. More info HERE. Cost = $15

Broken Social Scene is also playing at the Majestic Theater in Detroit on the 27th, but I'm at home then.

Take it to the streets!

Coming soon to theaters everywhere in Kresge

You wouldn't have thought so, but the very blue top-hat-and-monocle-wearing hippo head is indeed the exact image of Mark Twain.

Other excellent scenes from the five minute Mark Twain midterm film shot by beatniks on location this evening were the Tarintino and Guantanamo inspired tourture scene backed by a washed out American flag in the basement, the half-staff show down where da Profane Frank (in cowboy hat) was shot down dead (at least) five times, and the very popular hippo head/Twain dance sequence where Twain finds his life purpose in, quote, loving your mama.

So while supplies last and all that.

If TFing was the most popular form of intimacy, the world would be a kinder place for August.

New Party Trick: wearing a giant costume hippo head with a top hat and a monocle. See Lee at a party for further details.


In other news Ryan seems to have a toady.

Fighting the good fight for pigritia victoria

Prosp3ct: How go things on the beat front?
Silliman: um... latin, ghostbusters, hockey, a paisley shirt, with dishes laying around the living room.
Prosp3ct: In that order?
Silliman: pretty much.
Prosp3ct: Very well. Carry on soldier.
Silliman: Yes sir.

Where weirdness reins

August is ironically calling himself "Captain Alcoholic."

Ryan says genetics is obviously bunk because if there are genetics then how come his two scientist parents didn't give him the pass-chemistry-and-physics-easy-with-an-A gene? Huh?

Lee's driving to Wisconsin for a wedding of someone he doesn't know.

Jon and Dave just got back from "cleaning the House of the Lord."

I'm scrounging the internet for technical and scholarly articles on Artificial Intellegence.

I haven't seen Harvy in days. I think he's hiding.

The Beat got an honorable mention in the Collegian's best places to party. Apparently our parties are "very chill, pants optional."

I Swore a RUMBLING OATH to Abandon My Xanga

New blog...well...it's been around. Here's the link.

Over Jordan, over home

Last night we discovered a common appreciation for black gospel music, the old spirituals and so forth. Or maybe we just feel manly when we sing that low. Anyway none of us apparently know one whole song, but one of these days we're going to have Spirituals-Hymn-sing, with maybe a late slide into Johnny Cash. The lyrics - including Old Time Religion, Go Down Moses, Glory Glory Hallelujah, 'Zekial Saw the Wheel, I Am a Poor Wayfaring Stranger & Swing Low Sweet Chariot - are all here.

Speaking of the south, August "I hate you all" Stafford (who wasn't man enough to wear a Chester A. Arthur for even a day) thinks the Beat should get a deep frier so we can enjoy Elvis's beloved deep fried peanut butter and banana sandwhiches.

Mmmm--What Siliman meant to say was as follows:

Watching Blood

Watching Corpse

Getting Krunk't

Raiding the Mu Alpha Party and Stealing Foods

And Smoking Free Hookahs at the Arabic Party

... more to follow.

A Friday evenin' of culture (Hillsdale style)

2 - Group house cleaning by the whole sick crew.
6 - Viewing of a La Jete-styled (student) film starring Mr. Gibbons.
9 - Polka music at the Annex with, as Honey Bear said, dancing depending on pre-partying.
12 - Drinks and music at the funeral home.

To those who may be interested:

Lucinda Williams in Ann Arbor on Oct. 2.

Finer details of demonology

Nunn: If Satan really possesed Emily Rose... Wait. Wasn't he called Lucifer before the fall?
Silliman: Yeah.
Nunn: So if he's calling himself Lucifer then like he's not really.
Silliman: Well he might still call himself Lucifer.
Nunn: Shit, I thought I had him.
Silliman: You gotta remember, Lee, he's the Father of Lies.
Nunn: Damn.

Homecoming.

The Beat.

Saturday.

Be there!

Just so everyone is forewarned. I have a video camera this year. I plan to tape some, if not all, of the crazy shit that goes down at the beat. Any copies of these recordings must be hidden away, only to be shown at Beat gatherings, or to get some. Unles Boy Wonder starts running for political office. Then we may use them, collectivly, as a house, to black mail said boy wonder, who ever he may be. Typing drunk is hell. I see that Jon and I have missed the first No Pants Party, so I will post a picture from Scotland.

Cheers,
HARVY

SPREAD THE WORD: Party at the Beat Saturday. Chilling and jaming to ensue 9ish.

Inaugural links for the 1st day of classes

History of the tee shirt.

How to sacrifice a goat.

Apocalyptic squirrels.

I guess Amanda and I are...broken up...or something...on a break (maybe). I dunno, but I guess that was the last thing that was coming between sharing some tender, homoerotic moments in the same room with August this semester. See you all on the 21st. There are some pictures from the final Greybyrds show on my shit-ass xanga.

Peter Jennings is dead.

There goes the "liberal media."

Sssst. Burn!

As much as I was demanding a monkey, I'm willing to admit that even an Elvis-impersonating monkey would not liven up weeknights at The Beat like a couple of Lee's lasers and gernades.

Breaking news: RoboRyan is off campus.

Time to move a bed into the Turkish prison?

I'm AmTraking whatever trains of thought were present before this post.

I will freely admit I am pretentious. In fact, for no apparent reason,

The List of Things Deemed Bourgeoise:
-Spacing
-The Grateful Dead
-Eating
-Discussing Music
-Those Damn T-Shirts with Things Like "I Have Issues" Written Upon Them
-Debating about Music
-The Internet
-The Term "Bourgeoise"
-The Expression That Something Is "The New Black"
-Gene Wilder
-Art Garfunkel (the files for both "incredibly redundant" and "terrifically useless" were already full)
-Sex (although this falls more into the "passe" category)

'God used me as hammer, boys'

Ethical question: how sappy does a friend have to get before it's okay that you just have to punch him in the head?

Ryan, I'm talkin' to you.

Silliman, I find it very amusing that this is one of the first results when google image searching your name. It is not until much later in the search that you find this picture of you (looking very much like my aunt's former lover) or this one of you looking very kalifornia (notice how I spell it with a K, thereby making myself cool).

And if I have anything to say about it, this will be the new top result!

Where monkies are born every minute

I was thinking about Lee's monky, the one he doesn't have and is not bringing to the Beat. Too bad, I was thinking, a monkey'd be cool.

Heyman once had us all in stitches and all the smoking SAGA workers whispering wow with his description of how he was going to have a monkey and a turtle (working as a team). I know certain beatnik's would rather have a manatee, but really, where are we going to keep a manatee and could we fend off the attacking boat motors?

And if we can't have a manatee, we should have a monkey.

And then I was thinking, holy monky noir! Our own dear Finite is constantly tripping over to see his JewishMother in where?

Baraboo WI.

And what's in Baraboo WI?

The world flipping head quarters of the Barnum and Baily Bros. Big Top Circus. I mean, they're probably practically giving monkies away.

Today I drew a keg in CAD. Then I drew the Beat. Much amusement was had.

...and I just crashed my computer trying to figure out how many kegs we could fit in the Beat.

PS. I don't think I'm suppose to have CAD installed on my computer.

Strange, but I miss you guys.

Yesterday, a man in the gas station was complaining about the new cigarette tax here in Kentucky. He is apparently going to switch to Ky's Best from Camels because, he "refuses to pay more than $3 for a pack of smokes." After handing the cashier $2.05, he walked out of the store a happy man with a pack of smokes.

Eat your hearts out.

I bought a monkey today...

...no, not really but it was the only cool thing I could think of saying...

Party on, rock out, peace, etc.

Reflections on the weekend, anyone?

Beat Announcements:

Announcement the first:
This coming Tuesday, May the Third, Anno Domine Two-Thousand and Three will be held at the beat Ye Olde annual Toga Partae.

Announcement the second:
This coming Friday, May the Sixth, Anno Domine Two-Thousand and Three will be held at the beat the annual "That ain't poetry it's just noise" Beatnik Party.

Announcement the third:

I can't find that gallon of Everclear, which we should not allow into the wrong hands (Whiskey Kate).

"If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind."
-Kurt Vonnegut

ah, finals...

Cold pizza and gourmet coffee make a delightful breakfast and an energizing start to the day...especially when your day starts at 1 in the afternoon.

This morning/afternoon we were reminded that the front porch of the Beat is equiped with a doorbell. We were very excited.

Lou Reed, David Bowie, or Iggy Pop, and why.

Important Question:

Are the Beat members more like the Avengers, the Fantastic Four (despite numerical issues, naturally) or the X-men (If you need me to explain why we're not like the Justice League, you obviously should not be posting).

Party at the Beat Friday. Why? les raisons trois:

Reason the first (and foremost, incidentally): Just 'cause.

Reason the second: Dr. Dre was born today in 1965

Reason the third: It's either a coming-out party for my head, or a going-away party for my hair.

So, I'm watching the movie rendition of William Golding's Lord of the Flies...oh the irony.

FROM THE ABYSS OF ALUMNI-DOM

A few notes.

1) Wazoo has a blog. http://wildwazoo.blogspot.com. Check it out.

2) Seraphim is engaged.

3) Rome is cool.

4) Are my movies still at the Beat? If there's a whole bunch of old movies, they're mine. I'll come get them, sometime, some way, some how.

That is all.

hmm, we should probably be doing important studying right...or atleast cleaning the house...or sleeping. Instead I think Harvy and I are going to go to the movies...then come back and drink a lot of beer and study...mostly drink beer.

omg, that was stupid...hide the photos.

I just took a nap that was over an hour long. It was awesome.

If I get any more word of people defiling my couch, heads will roll.

Eh, just kiddin'. Keep it up, guys.

so, the Beat Boys are going on a search for the Unpardonable Sin....

This is going to be fun.

Where did this photo of me on my phone come from? cuz' it ain't flattering! ;o)

BeatBlog

Beat zen pour aujourd'hui:

Why is it so hard to walk a strait path when our eyes literally focus on heaven?

So Lee is wondering home from Walsh and Thrift's wine and cheese party. When I told Julia where everyone was, she thought I said a Hawaiian cheese party. We'll be having one about a month after I can either milk a Hawaiian cow, or put a shirt on a tub of Brie.

Will, with your permission, I shall also remain.

Prosp3ct, with your permission, I shall grovel as a good toady should.

Uh, another thursday night...to bad no one has a camera...

So. Today I arrived at yet another Friday night, unconvinced of our current standing as a "party house." Talk about convincing--A party--sans discernable theme, time, invitations etc--betook to throw itself upon our home. Three hours, two holes in the wall and 30 or so people later, the party rocked, my brain was fried, and I was convinced...¡Vive La Beat!

...BTW This is my first Beatblog post, and I'm drunkenated.


Peace.

Beat Halloween Party!!! Friday, October 29^th! Come in costume (prize to the best dressed man or woman*). Tell your friends and spread the word.

*Win a night with Bob & “Brown Team”

Malt Likker & Movies at the Beat.
Can we get any cooler?

So, maybe we should post something about the events of homecoming weekend…

First, I would suggest you check out the Collegian, it pretty much covers the whole thing.

<>Great weekend overall…except around 4 in the morning we were all sitting around the living room chatting (most everyone had gone home and the lights were out) when some Townies came in the backdoor. We asked them to leave…but they didn’t really want to. So a couple of us called the cops while the others tried to talk them down. Result; the Townies got upset and took some cheap shots and ran when they realized the cops were on the way. In the end, our laundry room was a pool of blood and some of our friends were looking pretty rough…but they’re ok and chicks dig scars, right?

Seriously, thanks guys. We owe you one.

Homecoming at the Beat, September 17th-18th. Be there!

Prosp3ct and I are wondering what has become of our beloved cactus, Drowning Bob. We believe he deserves his own room after being a housemate for so long.

The Beat is better than ever. The whole house has been refinished thanks to our great new landlord. Special thanks to everyone (beatniks and expatriates) who helped out with our special projects (the Beat now features a party annex and a SpeakEasy).

Packing List for the Beat:

-400 cigarettes
-50 cigars
-1 fifth of Wild Turkey 101
-1 fifth of Vodka
-1 case of beer (cheap)
-1 case of Ramen noodles
…hopefully we’ll get the blog updated soon. The new team is: Dave Frank, George Linzel, Harvey Jones, Jon Gibbons, August Stafford, Lee Nunn.

Admin privileges granted...I look forward to seeing a more active site.

Btw, I think I still have some boxes in the basement...I will try to find some way to come by and get them, though it's a very long drive to Hillsdale from Boston. Otherwise, I may ask some friends still at the 'dale to come get them for me (read, Konrad LaPrade). :)

Best of luck with another year, and remember me to the ol' 'dale. I miss it terribly, and the Beat most of all.

Who all is living there this year anyway?

Jared

So, could one of us new guys get admin status on the blog so we could update it (comments, descriptions, embarrassing photos of Will)???

The new guys are getting ready to move in. So far on our packing list the priorities appear to be
1) Shot Glasses
2) Deep freezer for animal parts
3) Matchbox "safety streets" metal detector with charming phrases such as "Looks like somebody forgot to empty their pockets" and "look what I found".

IF ANYONE EVER EVEN COMES HERE ANYMORE...

I'd just like to report that my lovely wife has become a fan of Futurama. I am rejoicing. I no longer have to sneak my viewings thereof like some guys (fortunately not me) have to sneak beer. :)

Life is good.

Finally joining in the fun at Hillsdale College.

Gugg's party is tonight at the Beat. I can't make it (stupid house-sitting responsibilities). But you all should. Let us all know how it was.

HEY, WOAH: For some reason a Reist quote seemed apropos to the following question: Is it cool with y'all if we use the Beat for Mr. Gugg's bachelor party on the 26th of December (which, btw, every single one of you is invited to)?

Let me know (1) if we may use the house/fire pit, and (2) which of y'all can attend the festivities, hereafter dubbed "The Gugg Hitchin' Christmas Time Festival: Let All Women Rejoice and All Men Make That Funny Little Expression With Furrowed Eyebrows Expressing Something Between Confusion, Surprise, and Despair."

I think you lazy blog slackers at the Beat should join in on this crazy little shindig. This way, you get to see who is like me and who would complement me well. Aren't you thrilled?

Um...right...

Or, you could just join in to start some action in this ghost-town-ish corner of the web already.

SimilarMinds Compatibility Results okoye ||||||||| 95% |||||||| 90% pulchersentio ||||||| 81% ||||||| 79% hebe |||||| 69% ||||||| 81% bobgolding |||||| 70% ||||||| 78% tildegauche ||||| 57% |||||| 68% ockhamist ||||| 57% |||| 54% djhugger |||| 50% ||||| 62% similarity complementarity

How compatible are you and your friends?

THE UNDEAD: Boo! I'm back from oblivion.

I remember the Beat being a much more exciting place when I was there than it seems to be now. Where are the crazy little posts about Sato's ad hominem attacks on everybody? Where are the ludicrous quotes? Where are the stories about good ol' Beat near-nudity? What gives?

Did y'all get boring or something?

Maybe you're all dead.

The party seemed to be a pretty decent time for all, or at least most, involved. Lots of good costumes. Post your vote for the best one as a comment. Maybe the winner will get a taco. Or a cookie. Or nothing. Or something. Pics are forthcoming, I'll let you know when and where they're up.

Tales from the Upstairs Closet

Silliman wants some stories about the organ, eh? Well, for now, this is, sadly, as exciting as it gets.
The Organ (I think we should name him "Spleen") has finally found a home. Migrating first from the back hall to the kitchen, it slowly worked its way up the stairs to what had been Wazoo's room, and was The Beaver's room before that. There it sat, for days upon days, in the middle of the glorified closet, merely taking up space that nobody was bothering to use. Then came the fateful day of... *du dum dauuuhhm* the arrival of Phil's PS2! Sitting on the floor unused (as Phil refuses to buy any Playstation games) in the main room, he finally decided to move it upstairs to the other TV. Hating the current location of Spleen, he and Wazoo (I believe; if Wazoo had no part in this, correct me) found a nice spot for it next to the keyboard.

Now that the PS2 is connected, I had an idea for a low-key party that would be very much in-line with the way we often do things around here. Some night, when we're all really bored in the dead of winter, we get every DVD-capable machine playing a movie. Everyone picks one to start with, and then switches every 20 minutes, give or take. By my count we can get at least five, probably six, flicks playing, and given some of our selection options, it could prove to be a pretty... interesting result. Allow me to repeat, "When we're all really bored." And maybe whoever is watching one on the Playstation can provide their own score on The Spleen.

Gugg: You are so fired. You want a blog for your dorm, you go ahead and make one, but step back from the brink, man. We may be negligent of the blog as of late, yes, but that's no excuse to say we've "abdicated" jack or squat.