Gary and Len were born 3,000 years ago in ancient Hong Kong and knew all the names of the forgotten gods.

In his earliest years, Len's dinosaur phase taught him of the fleetingness of power. That settled, he never sought imperial office. Gary, however, was the first youngster to learn to ride his Big Wheel, and the taste of domination was there implanted.

A series of vacuums of power, coupled with Gary's ability to sneeze in threes, blew him onto the imperial throne. Len attended a prestigious music school and grew fond of the sitar.

During the emergence of the Han Dynasty, the brothers rendezvoused in modern-day Guam and returned to China with the gift of fireworks.

They piddled about.

In 1784 the pair washed up on the shores of Nevis. Taken for dead, a seafaring merchant nursed the brothers. Their vim and vigor restored, they took residence in Portugal. Now fluent in the languages of four continents, Gary matriculated to Oxford University, while Len buried the Portuguese rock sitar tablets in a manmade mountain beneath loose soil.

Gary is the mythological father of Gary, Indiana. Len could duke in the litter box and be out before it hit the sand.

Seen in this photograph, taken in 1951, Gary and Len are caught in a rare non-action shot, the last image of the now-missing brothers.



Boys, say hello to Gary and Len, found at “102,000 Old Books” in Allen, Michigan.